Aimsbury

2015-03-11T00:02:10Z

Katrina Ludd:

A chef encountered in {{MM}}, who works in the [[Mr Fusspot|Chairman]]'s Suite at the [[Royal Bank of Ankh-Morpork]]. He is afflicted with an embarrassing [[Garlic|allergy]] and has very little experience of catering for humans. In fact, he prefers to call himself a canine chef. His daughter [[Peggy]] steers him through the little traumas of life and also makes a mean omelette. He is the ever-hopeful author of ''Cooking with Brains'', which has so far failed to propel him into the culinary stratosphere. He apparently delights in cooking minced [[collops]], making him the perfect chef for [[Adora Belle Dearheart]], who delights in ''eating'' minced collops.

==Annotation==

Thinking about it, ''Cooking with Brains'' has a resonance elsewhere in humorous literature, as author Sue Townshend's great diarist Adrian Mole, when aged about 29 and three quarters, is very briefly in Vogue as the author of a cookery book called ''Cooking with Offal'', which refreshes the jaded food palate of the fashionable London dining out set... although not for very long, as his brief moment of fame soon evaporates.

[[Category:Discworld characters]]
[[Category:Human characters]]
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Discworld calendar

2015-03-03T21:48:26Z

Katrina Ludd:

''This article is about the counting and naming of years and days on Discworld. For calendar books like the ''[[Book:Discworld's Assassins' Guild Diary 2000|Discworld's Assassins' Guild Diary 2000]]'' see [[Bibliography#Miscellany|Bibliography]].''

==General==
A Discworld celestial year has 800 days and because of some interesting astronomical facts two of each seasons (two summers, two winters, etc.). This leads to the fact that many people actually do not count the astronomical years, but the half-years with 400 days, often refered to as "common years". The half-year has 13 months:
[[Offle]], February, March, April, May, June, Grune, August, Spune, Sektober, Ember, December, and [[Ick]]. Each month except Ick has 32 days, Ick has 16 days. Each week has eight days. The eighth day of each week is called Octeday.

There are two main calendars in use on Discworld. The [[Ankh-Morpork Calendar]] counts full years and starts at the founding of [[Ankh-Morpork]], the [[University Calendar]] starts at the founding of [[Unseen University]] (in 1282 AM) and counts in half-years. Oddly enough, while the Imperial Ankh-Morpork calendar offers intellectual purity and mathematical elegance, the general populace tends to use the Weird, Wild, Wacky Wizards' calendar, which happens to correspond to the growing season.

==Years and centuries==
Centuries and years are named. We are currently in the Century of the Anchovy ({{CJ}}). It was preceded by the Century of the Fruitbat ({{MP}}) and even earlier by the Century of the Three Lice and the Century of the Cobra ({{SG}}). 2007 is the year of the Reversed Ptarmigan. 2015 is the year of the spinning mouse.

== Notable past years==

*The [[Kreeblephor|Year of the Lenient Vegetable]] - in which Bishop [[Kreeblephor]] converted a demon to the [[Om]]nian faith;
*The [[Year of the Pensive Hare]] - the events of {{UA}} take place shortly after the New Year celebrations which usher in this year.
* The [[Year of the Astounded Beetle]] ‎;
* The [[Year of the Engaging Sloth]] ;
* The [[Year of the Notional Serpent]] ‎;

==Special holidays==

* [[Hogswatch]] (first of Ick, start of year)
* [[Soul Cake Tuesday]]
* Day of the Lesser Gods (?same as below?)
* [[Eve of Small Gods]], first midsummer day
* Samedi Nuit Mort (celebrated in Genua)
* Creator's Birthday (28th of April)
* Wear a lilac if you were [[Glorious Revolution|there]] day (25th of May)
* Koom Valley Day (5th of Grune)
* [[Crueltide]], half-year point (end of first half-year, start of next)
* [[Alls Fallow]], 3/4 point of 800-day year, the one day when witches and warlocks stay in bed (parodying {{wp|Halloween|Halloween}}), though in [[Wyrd Sisters]], [[Esmerelda Weatherwax]] suggests that [[Hogswatch]] is the one day witches shouldn't go out, though this may only apply to Mistress Weatherwax, since her arrival may cause people to feel wary rather than jolly.

== Seasons ==

* Spring Prime, first spring
* Summer : mid-point ''Small Gods' Eve''
* Autumn Prime, first autumn
* Winter Secundus aka Spindlewinter : Mid-point ''Crueltide''
* Secundus Spring
* Summer Two : mid-point ''All's Fallow''
* Secundus Autumn
* Backspindlewinter : mid-point ''Hogswatch''

Discworld seasons are 'explained' in one of four paragraphs in the footnote on page 5 of ''The Colour of Magic''. It is written:

"Since the disc's tiny orbiting sunlet maintains a fixed orbit while the majestic disc turns slowly beneath it, it will be readily deduced that a disc year consists of not four but eight seasons. The summers are those times when the sun rises or sets at the nearest point on the Rim, the winters those occasions when it rises or sets at a point around ninety degrees along the circumference."

==Zodiac==

The Discworld zodiac consists of 64 (8*8) constellations, nebulae or individual stars grouped in thirteen ''Houses''. There may be other constellations that are not part of the zodiac, but it's possible that the Discworld's unusual revolution means that the Discworld sun and/or moon enters all constellations at least once (the "zodiac" is a list of constellations in which the sun or moon [or planets, but there don't seem to be any around Discworld] can be found at some point in time). [[Roundworld]] has 88 constellations (1 of them non-contiguous), 12 of which are in the zodiac (a 13th constellation is also technically in the zodiac, but is not recognized as part of the zodiac).

===The Houses of the Zodiac and their 64 Elements :===
:as described by the well-known mages and scholars Pratchett of Sarum and Pearson of Wincanton

*'''The First House''' - The House of Io
**The Eye of Io
** The Crab
**The Cow of Heaven
**The (Knotted) String
**The Celestial Parsnip

*'''The Second House''' - The House of the Gate
**[[Wezen (the double-headed kangaroo)]]
**The Two Fat Cousins
**The Perhaps Gate
**Scarab's Claw
**Mubbo the Hyena

*'''The Third House''' - The House of the Bull
**Silicarous's Gift
**The Bull
**Hast's Trumpet
**Cubal's Flame
**The Void

*'''The Fourth House''' - The House of Melok
**Melok
**Old Toesy
**Vut the Evenstar
**Mr Williams
**Occasional Paddles

*'''The Fifth House''' - The House of the Bright Cabbage
**Blic-Blick
**The Bright Cabbage
**The Starfish
**Old Dog
**Crabbus

*'''The Sixth House''' - The House of the Plow
**Pashmina
**The Flying Moose
**The Pitcher (or Bucket)
**Plough Handle
**Okjock the Salesman

*'''The Seventh House''' - The House of the Star
**The Faint Star Major
**The Faint Star Minor
**The Little Turtle
**The Flagon
**Ket's Knife

*'''The Next House''' - The House of Woldar
**Woldar
**Evar's Footprint
**The Ram's Horn
**Two Rivers
**Young Faithful

*'''The Ninth House''' - The House of the Ram
**The Jumping Ram
**[[Khefin]]'s Eye 1
**Khefin's Eye 2
**Khefin's Eye 3
**Khefin's Eye 4

*'''The Tenth House''' - The House of Trabnor
**Trabnor
**The Lanthorn
**The Wicket
**Turnip's Tail
**The Snipe

*'''The Eleventh House''' - The House of the Horse
**Teg the Horse
**The Miller's Pocket
**Astoria's Flame
**The Cradle
**The Sleeping Dog

*'''The Twelfth House''' - The House of Fore and Aft
**Young Harry
**Forward
**Aft
**Vut's Candle
**Silur the Catfish

*'''The Thirteenth House''' - The Dread House
**Old Faithful
**The Scythe
**The Coffee Cup
**[[Gahoolie the Vase of Tulips]]

===Annotations===

* Wezen the Doubleheaded Kangaroo: the first constellation (interesting because the wizards don't seem to recognize a kangaroo when they see it in {{TLC}}-- perhaps because it was flattened and had only one head? Although in fairness you couldn't recognize anything else from it's constellation either, and it's never really obvious what is mythical and what isn't!)
* The Two Fat Cousins: possible reference to Tweedledee and Tweedledum?
* The Flying Moose: possible reference to Rocky The Flying Squirrel and Bullwinkle J Moose
* [[The Small Boring Group of Faint Stars]]: Rincewind's birth sign, usually not a wizard's sign. Was much brighter thousands of years ago when the Disc was closer to it (according to {{TLC}}), so it's not clear why the ancients called it "faint"; perhaps they knew the Disc would move away from it long-term?
* The Knotted String: possible pun on "I'm a frayed knot" jokes
* [[Gahoolie the Vase of Tulips]]: the last constellation (now if we could only find that whale)
* the Triangle, mentioned in {{TLC}}, possibly not part of the zodiac

==Related pages==
* [[Discworld Timeline]]
* [[:category:Discworld Timeline|Discworld timeline category]]

[[Category:Discworld concepts]]
[[Category:Discworld Timeline]]

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Aimsbury

Discworld calendar