Ankh-Morpork Post Office - Revision history

Narrativium: Spelling corrected

2022-04-19T18:07:44Z

Spelling corrected

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	===Four men dead in five weeks===		===Four men dead in five weeks===
	* Mr Mutable - Described as a decent chap, fell to his death into the big hall from the fifth floor.		* Mr Mutable - Described as a decent chap, fell to his death into the big hall from the fifth floor.
	* Mr Sideburn - Fell down the back stairs and broke his neck at 3 o'clock in ~~then~~ morning.		* Mr Sideburn - Fell down the back stairs and broke his neck at 3 o'clock in the morning.
	* Mr Ignavia - Found dead as a doornail, his face all contorted like he'd seen a ghost. The Watch & their [[Angua\|werewolf]] were forced to conclude it was death by natural causes, and that no one had been near the body.		* Mr Ignavia - Found dead as a doornail, his face all contorted like he'd seen a ghost. The Watch & their [[Angua\|werewolf]] were forced to conclude it was death by natural causes, and that no one had been near the body.
	* Mr Whobblebury - A [[Dark Clerk]] in the service of the Patrician, he was always snooping around. He found and closely inspected the Mail Sorting Engine just before his death. The post office staff were first alerted to this when the cat, [[Mr Tiddles]], came in carrying a bit of him. In the words of Stanley; "His head was all over the wall!!".		* Mr Whobblebury - A [[Dark Clerk]] in the service of the Patrician, he was always snooping around. He found and closely inspected the Mail Sorting Engine just before his death. The post office staff were first alerted to this when the cat, [[Mr Tiddles]], came in carrying a bit of him. In the words of Stanley; "His head was all over the wall!!".

AgProv: Expanding with information from the relevant Yearbook

2016-07-16T21:04:12Z

Expanding with information from the relevant Yearbook

← Older revision		Revision as of 21:04, 16 July 2016
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	==History==		==History==
	===Downfall===		===Downfall===
	Captain [[Carrot Ironfoundersson]] of the [[Ankh-Morpork City Watch]] once called the '''Post Office''' the ''Royal Mail'', for this government office is derived from offices that were in existence back in the time of the kings of Ankh. Like many other divisions of the city government (ex. the Watch and the ''[[Ankh-Morpork Mint\|Royal Mint]]''), the Post Office has been a little-used, neglected, inefficient office for many decades.		Captain [[Carrot Ironfoundersson]] of the [[Ankh-Morpork City Watch]] once called the '''Post Office''' the ''Royal Mail'', for this government office is derived from offices that were in existence back in the time of the kings of Ankh. Like many other divisions of the city government (ex. the Watch and the ''[[Ankh-Morpork Mint\|Royal Mint]]''), the Post Office has been a little-used, neglected, inefficient office for many decades. The history of the Post Office is sketched out largely through explanatory footnotes and sidebar comments in the {{AMPOH}}.

	For the Watch, the dwindling had been due to the legalization of the [[Guilds of Ankh-Morpork\|Guilds]] by the [[Patrician]], Lord [[Havelock Vetinari]]; the Guilds essentially took over most Watch duties and the Watch became unnecessary. For the Post Office things were different. Many decades ago, the Post Office was a proud institution, where the Postmaster General, Chief Postal Inspector, and everybody working there wanted to provide good service to the citizens. The place bustled with customers and employees. There were branch offices throughout different areas of the city. One day, disaster struck, or rather, was acquired by Postmaster General Cowerby. He was a man for efficiency, so he acquired a ''Mail-Sorting Engine''; it had been designed by [[Bergholt Stuttley Johnson]] who originally intended it to be an organ (musical instrument). The ''wrong-ness'' of the Engine went beyond serving a different purpose than originally intended. By some amazing stupidity, Johnson managed to make the Engine tap through many layers of the space-time continuum, and the Engine spewed out mail that the postal workers didn't put into it. There were letters from the future, mail from alternate universes, and notes that people swore they had written and posted but had never, really. For a while, Postmaster Cowerby entertained that this enabled the Post Office to deliver mail before it was posted, only that wouldn't be very polite, so they would hold the mail, and then once it was posted, they would go out and deliver it. However, the mail from the Engine overwhelmed the working capacity of the postal workers. One day, Chief Postal Inspector Rumbelow beat up the Engine until it stopped spewing mail, but there were already mountains of letters filling every room, every corridor in the five-story building of the main Post Office. Things went downhill after that. The Post Office was closed in all but name. All furniture had been stolen. The pay to the employees stopped arriving from the [[Patrician's Palace]]. Feral pigeons colonized the Post Office building. Postmen retired. Enthusiastic citizens put graffiti on the walls. There were no more customers.		For the Watch, the dwindling had been due to the legalization of the [[Guilds of Ankh-Morpork\|Guilds]] by the [[Patrician]], Lord [[Havelock Vetinari]]; the Guilds essentially took over most Watch duties and the Watch became unnecessary. For the Post Office things were different. Many decades ago, the Post Office was a proud institution, where the Postmaster General, Chief Postal Inspector, and everybody working there wanted to provide good service to the citizens. The place bustled with customers and employees. There were branch offices throughout different areas of the city. One day, disaster struck, or rather, was acquired by Postmaster General Cowerby. He was a man for efficiency, so he acquired a ''Mail-Sorting Engine''; it had been designed by [[Bergholt Stuttley Johnson]] who originally intended it to be an organ (musical instrument). The ''wrong-ness'' of the Engine went beyond serving a different purpose than originally intended. By some amazing stupidity, Johnson managed to make the Engine tap through many layers of the space-time continuum, and the Engine spewed out mail that the postal workers didn't put into it. There were letters from the future, mail from alternate universes, and notes that people swore they had written and posted but had never, really. For a while, Postmaster Cowerby entertained that this enabled the Post Office to deliver mail before it was posted, only that wouldn't be very polite, so they would hold the mail, and then once it was posted, they would go out and deliver it. However, the mail from the Engine overwhelmed the working capacity of the postal workers. One day, Chief Postal Inspector Rumbelow beat up the Engine until it stopped spewing mail, but there were already mountains of letters filling every room, every corridor in the five-story building of the main Post Office. Things went downhill after that. The Post Office was closed in all but name. All furniture had been stolen. The pay to the employees stopped arriving from the [[Patrician's Palace]]. Feral pigeons colonized the Post Office building. Postmen retired. Enthusiastic citizens put graffiti on the walls. There were no more customers.

AgProv: /* Heroes Of The Post Office: */

2016-07-16T17:54:26Z

Heroes Of The Post Office:

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	These are past and present members of staff who have gone over and beyond the call of duty and whose actions are still cited today as inspiration to postal staff and examples to emulate. Any postman actually dying in the course of duty is assured of a place in the Roll of Honour. Really meritorious acts of valour may be rewarded, sometimes posthumously, with the Post Office Medal of Valour. Recipients include:		These are past and present members of staff who have gone over and beyond the call of duty and whose actions are still cited today as inspiration to postal staff and examples to emulate. Any postman actually dying in the course of duty is assured of a place in the Roll of Honour. Really meritorious acts of valour may be rewarded, sometimes posthumously, with the Post Office Medal of Valour. Recipients include:

	* Extremely Senior Postman [[Anghammarad]].		* Extremely Senior Postman [[Anghammarad]]
			* Postmaster-General [[Elwes]]
	* Miss [[Honoria Maccalariat]]		* Miss [[Honoria Maccalariat]]
	* Temporary Hogswatch Postman [[Rodney Postlethwaite]]		* Temporary Hogswatch Postman [[Rodney Postlethwaite]]

AgProv: /* Heroes Of The Post Office: */ expanding

2016-07-16T17:35:34Z

Heroes Of The Post Office:: expanding

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	==Heroes Of The Post Office:==		==Heroes Of The Post Office:==
	These are past and present members of staff who have gone over and beyond the call of duty and whose actions are still cited today as inspiration to postal staff and examples to emulate. Any postman actually dying in the course of duty is assured of a place in the Roll of Honour. ~~They~~ include:		These are past and present members of staff who have gone over and beyond the call of duty and whose actions are still cited today as inspiration to postal staff and examples to emulate. Any postman actually dying in the course of duty is assured of a place in the Roll of Honour. Really meritorious acts of valour may be rewarded, sometimes posthumously, with the Post Office Medal of Valour. Recipients include:

	* Extremely Senior Postman [[Anghammarad]].		* Extremely Senior Postman [[Anghammarad]].

AgProv: one of those minor little one-letter correctinos that make all the difference

2016-07-13T10:14:38Z

one of those minor little one-letter correctinos that make all the difference

← Older revision		Revision as of 10:14, 13 July 2016
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	==Heroes Of The Post Office:==		==Heroes Of The Post Office:==
	These are past and present members of staff who have gone over and beyond the call of duty and whose actions are still cited today as inspiration to postal staff and examples to emulate. Any postman actually dying in the course of duty is assured of a place in the ~~Role~~ of Honour. They include:		These are past and present members of staff who have gone over and beyond the call of duty and whose actions are still cited today as inspiration to postal staff and examples to emulate. Any postman actually dying in the course of duty is assured of a place in the Roll of Honour. They include:

	* Extremely Senior Postman [[Anghammarad]].		* Extremely Senior Postman [[Anghammarad]].

AgProv: /* Heroes Of The Post Office: */

2016-07-12T23:35:22Z

Heroes Of The Post Office:

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	* Extremely Senior Postman [[Anghammarad]].		* Extremely Senior Postman [[Anghammarad]].
	* Miss [[Honoria Maccalariat]]		* Miss [[Honoria Maccalariat]]
	* Temporary Hogswatch Postman [[Rodney ~~Postelthwaite~~]]		* Temporary Hogswatch Postman [[Rodney Postlethwaite]]
	* Senior Postman [[Desmond Pontefract\|Granville Roberts]]		* Senior Postman [[Desmond Pontefract\|Granville Roberts]]
	* Postman [[Henry Sloop]]		* Postman [[Henry Sloop]]

AgProv: /* Heroes Of The Post Office: */

2016-07-12T23:24:10Z

Heroes Of The Post Office:

← Older revision		Revision as of 23:24, 12 July 2016
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	* Extremely Senior Postman [[Anghammarad]].		* Extremely Senior Postman [[Anghammarad]].
	* Miss [[Honoria Maccalariat]]		* Miss [[Honoria Maccalariat]]
			* Temporary Hogswatch Postman [[Rodney Postelthwaite]]
	* Senior Postman [[Desmond Pontefract\|Granville Roberts]]		* Senior Postman [[Desmond Pontefract\|Granville Roberts]]
			* Postman [[Henry Sloop]]
			* Miss [[Alexandra Willet]]
	* Miss [[Amelie Willet]]		* Miss [[Amelie Willet]]

AgProv: /* Heroes Of The Post Office: */

2016-07-12T23:12:36Z

Heroes Of The Post Office:

← Older revision		Revision as of 23:12, 12 July 2016
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	* Extremely Senior Postman [[Anghammarad]].		* Extremely Senior Postman [[Anghammarad]].
	* Miss ~~Honoria~~ [[Maccalariat]]		* Miss [[Honoria Maccalariat]]
	* Senior Postman [[Desmond Pontefract\|Granville Roberts]]		* Senior Postman [[Desmond Pontefract\|Granville Roberts]]
	* Miss [[Amelie Willet]]		* Miss [[Amelie Willet]]

AgProv: /* Heroes Of The Post Office: */

2016-07-12T23:02:09Z

Heroes Of The Post Office:

← Older revision		Revision as of 23:02, 12 July 2016
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	* Extremely Senior Postman [[Anghammarad]].		* Extremely Senior Postman [[Anghammarad]].
			* Miss Honoria [[Maccalariat]]
	* Senior Postman [[Desmond Pontefract\|Granville Roberts]]		* Senior Postman [[Desmond Pontefract\|Granville Roberts]]
			* Miss [[Amelie Willet]]

AgProv: /* Heroes Of The Post Office: */

2016-07-12T22:59:23Z

Heroes Of The Post Office:

← Older revision		Revision as of 22:59, 12 July 2016
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	These are past and present members of staff who have gone over and beyond the call of duty and whose actions are still cited today as inspiration to postal staff and examples to emulate. Any postman actually dying in the course of duty is assured of a place in the Role of Honour. They include:		These are past and present members of staff who have gone over and beyond the call of duty and whose actions are still cited today as inspiration to postal staff and examples to emulate. Any postman actually dying in the course of duty is assured of a place in the Role of Honour. They include:

	* ~~Very~~ Senior Postman [[Anghammarad]].		* Extremely Senior Postman [[Anghammarad]].
	* Senior Postman [[Desmond Pontefract\|Granville Roberts]]		* Senior Postman [[Desmond Pontefract\|Granville Roberts]]