Asphalt - Revision history

Old Dickens: remove empty template

2017-10-22T17:21:45Z

remove empty template

← Older revision		Revision as of 17:21, 22 October 2017
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	~~{{Character Data~~
	~~\|title= Asphalt~~
	~~\|photo=~~
	~~\|name= Asphalt~~
	~~\|age=~~
	~~\|race= Troll~~

	~~\|occupation= Roadie~~
	~~\|appearance= Short~~

	~~\|residence= Ankh-Morpork~~

	~~\|death=~~
	~~\|parents=~~
	~~\|relatives=~~
	~~\|children=~~
	~~\|marital status=~~

	~~\|books= {{SM}}~~
	~~\|cameos=~~
	}}

	'''Asphalt''' was - for a brief moment in time - the roadie hired by [[CMOT Dibbler]] to look after [[The Band With Rocks In]] - or, more accurately, look after the money that was, technically, Dibbler's.		'''Asphalt''' was - for a brief moment in time - the roadie hired by [[CMOT Dibbler]] to look after [[The Band With Rocks In]] - or, more accurately, look after the money that was, technically, Dibbler's.

Old Dickens at 00:36, 28 November 2013

2013-11-28T00:36:11Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 00:36, 28 November 2013
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	:
	[[Category:Discworld characters]]		[[Category:Discworld characters]]
	[[Category:Troll characters]]		[[Category:Troll characters]]
	[[de:Asphalt]]		[[de:Asphalt]]

Old Dickens: layout

2013-10-27T23:50:59Z

layout

← Older revision		Revision as of 23:50, 27 October 2013
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	It is also worth mentioning that a You-Tube clip exists capturing the moment a zookeeper is sat upon by an elephant. What saves the zookeeper from being crushed to death is a certain form of intrusion upon the bodily rights of the elephant. This results in an eye-crossing moment for said pachyderm, a bellow of consternated alarm, and a bout of wholly understandable stress incontinence. While the keeper, spared being crushed, has the problem of being jammed into a fairly tight airless space to worry about, he doesn't need to worry about it for too long, as the elephant flushes him out, so to speak, perfectly naturally. This leaves the keeper in some shock and disarray of clothing, and an elephant ruminating on the eternal truth of its own verse of the "Hedgehog Song".		It is also worth mentioning that a You-Tube clip exists capturing the moment a zookeeper is sat upon by an elephant. What saves the zookeeper from being crushed to death is a certain form of intrusion upon the bodily rights of the elephant. This results in an eye-crossing moment for said pachyderm, a bellow of consternated alarm, and a bout of wholly understandable stress incontinence. While the keeper, spared being crushed, has the problem of being jammed into a fairly tight airless space to worry about, he doesn't need to worry about it for too long, as the elephant flushes him out, so to speak, perfectly naturally. This leaves the keeper in some shock and disarray of clothing, and an elephant ruminating on the eternal truth of its own verse of the "Hedgehog Song".

	The link will be posted here once found. Here'tis - though edited - [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xtXZSHKj1JM]		The link will be posted here once found. Here 'tis - though edited - [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xtXZSHKj1JM]

	On asphalt itself - a material where a thick tarry bitumen is used to lock graded gravels together, generally into a firm wear-~~resistent~~ all-year road surface - see here. [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asphalt] Is Asphalt the troll therefore largely bitumen, which acts as a glue holding together reclaimed second-hand gravel? No wonder other trolls look down on him...		On asphalt itself - a material where a thick tarry bitumen is used to lock graded gravels together, generally into a firm wear-resistant all-year road surface - see here. [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asphalt] Is Asphalt the troll therefore largely bitumen, which acts as a glue holding together reclaimed second-hand gravel? No wonder other trolls look down on him.


			:
	[[Category:Discworld characters]]		[[Category:Discworld characters]]
	[[Category:Troll characters]]		[[Category:Troll characters]]
	[[de:Asphalt]]		[[de:Asphalt]]

User: 1 revision: Discworld import

2012-09-23T21:51:57Z

1 revision: Discworld import

New page

{{Character Data
|title= Asphalt
|photo=
|name= Asphalt
|age=
|race= Troll

|occupation= Roadie
|appearance= Short

|residence= Ankh-Morpork

|death=
|parents=
|relatives=
|children=
|marital status=

|books= {{SM}}
|cameos=
}}

'''Asphalt''' was - for a brief moment in time - the roadie hired by [[CMOT Dibbler]] to look after [[The Band With Rocks In]] - or, more accurately, look after the money that was, technically, Dibbler's.

He was the shortest [[Troll]] ever seen. This was because in his scarred heart he knew he was born to be in show business. And like 99% of people who know that, he wasn't destined to be, but he could damn' well leave his mark somewhere. He went off with a circus and was sat on by an elephant, hence his unusual shape.

And then he came across [[Music With Rocks In]], and he was hooked, just like the rest.

==Annotation==

"Roadie" - one who goes out on the road. What are roads made of on [[Roundworld]]? ''Asphalt''. Which leads us to the chicken-egg conundrum. Are [[Ankh-Morpork]]'s roads made with asphalt? Is it a rock in its own right? Where did the name come from otherwise?

It is also worth mentioning that a You-Tube clip exists capturing the moment a zookeeper is sat upon by an elephant. What saves the zookeeper from being crushed to death is a certain form of intrusion upon the bodily rights of the elephant. This results in an eye-crossing moment for said pachyderm, a bellow of consternated alarm, and a bout of wholly understandable stress incontinence. While the keeper, spared being crushed, has the problem of being jammed into a fairly tight airless space to worry about, he doesn't need to worry about it for too long, as the elephant flushes him out, so to speak, perfectly naturally. This leaves the keeper in some shock and disarray of clothing, and an elephant ruminating on the eternal truth of its own verse of the "Hedgehog Song".

The link will be posted here once found. Here'tis - though edited - [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xtXZSHKj1JM]

On asphalt itself - a material where a thick tarry bitumen is used to lock graded gravels together, generally into a firm wear-resistent all-year road surface - see here. [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asphalt] Is Asphalt the troll therefore largely bitumen, which acts as a glue holding together reclaimed second-hand gravel? No wonder other trolls look down on him...

[[Category:Discworld characters]]
[[Category:Troll characters]]
[[de:Asphalt]]

← Older revision		Revision as of 17:21, 22 October 2017
Line 1:		Line 1:
	~~{{Character Data~~
	~~\|title= Asphalt~~
	~~\|photo=~~
	~~\|name= Asphalt~~
	~~\|age=~~
	~~\|race= Troll~~

	~~\|occupation= Roadie~~
	~~\|appearance= Short~~

	~~\|residence= Ankh-Morpork~~

	~~\|death=~~
	~~\|parents=~~
	~~\|relatives=~~
	~~\|children=~~
	~~\|marital status=~~

	~~\|books= {{SM}}~~
	~~\|cameos=~~
	}}

	'''Asphalt''' was - for a brief moment in time - the roadie hired by [[CMOT Dibbler]] to look after [[The Band With Rocks In]] - or, more accurately, look after the money that was, technically, Dibbler's.		'''Asphalt''' was - for a brief moment in time - the roadie hired by [[CMOT Dibbler]] to look after [[The Band With Rocks In]] - or, more accurately, look after the money that was, technically, Dibbler's.