Anoia
| Anoia | |
 | |
| Name | Anoia |
| Race | Deity |
| Age | Infinite |
| Occupation | Goddess of Things That Get Stuck in Drawers |
| Physical appearance | Human woman smoking a cigarette |
| Residence | |
| Death | |
| Parents | |
| Relatives | |
| Children | |
| Marital Status | |
| Appearances | |
| Books | |
| Cameos | Going Postal, Making Money, Wintersmith |
Goddess of Things That Get Stuck in Drawers, a minor goddess on the Discworld. When someone rattles a drawer and cries "How can it close on the damned thing but not open with it? Who bought this? Do we ever use it?", even though the person might be genuinely irritated or even exasperated, it is as praise unto Anoia. Faithful Anoians (worshippers of Anoia) purposefully rattle their drawers and complain every day. Anoia also finds objects that roll under other objects and things stuck in sofa cushions, and is considering handling stuck zippers. She eats corkscrews.
Anoia's following increased during the events of Going Postal, though few of them are likely to remain sincere. Since she draws belief from unintentional drawer-rattlers across the Disc, it is possible that Anoians are not her primary power base. Even so, in the soap-opera "Heat Magazine" world of the Gods, Anoia is tipped for stardom: the coveted position of Goddess of Lost Causes may soon be hers.
Moist von Lipwig sticks a ladle in a drawer in Making Money to appease Anoia and later expects political help from the new high priestess of Anoia. In fact, Anoia herself provides practical help to Moist and Adora Belle Dearheart, when they are menaced down a dark alley by Moist's former partner in crime Cribbins. With a liberal interpretation of her own remit, the Goddess evidently treats Cribbins' false teeth as though they are an item stuck in a drawer, and terminally releases their spring joints with such force that according to a doctor (Mossy Lawn?) one of the springs is found embedded in his sinuses and another penetrates his cheek. Moist resolves to hang a ladle in the temple as thanks to his patron Goddess.
Anoia later appeared in Wintersmith, in which it was made evident that she was formerly the volcano goddess Lela. During that appearance she mentioned that she has not been in her current position long, but what constitutes a long time to a god is unclear.
Anoia appears as a thin woman, wrapped in a sheet, and smoking a cigarette that emits flame and sparks, possibly a holdover from her previous position as a volcano goddess. Anghammarad noted a similarity between Anoia (as Lela) and Adora Belle Dearheart, and indeed both are slender, cynical women who smoke cigarettes while cupping one elbow in the free hand.
The Temple of Anoia is on Cable Street, just over the bookies' shop.
In a religious homily reprinted in The Compleat Ankh-Morpork, a hapless clergyman identified as the Reverend Lamister falls foul of Anoia in a big way. Or maybe he appeals to her sense of humour. Lamister defines himself as an Omnian but when something gets stuck in a drawer, he does not mention Anoia once. Things rapidly escalate...
not to be confused with Annoia, pronounced Annoy-yer. This is the alternative name for the medical condition known as paranoia inversa.