Catroaster
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Catroaster was a philosopher of Ankh-Morpork whose curriculum vitae might have been longer if the Guild of Merchants hadn't taken great offense at his aphorism: "When a man is tired of Ankh-Morpork, he is tired of ankle-deep slurry." Shortly after this announcement he was found face down in or on the river, following the Guild's short re-education program.